Communicating across generations is difficult. Despite advances in technology that allow us to share thoughts and ideas without typing so much as a single letter, misunderstandings are still all too common. Luckily, we’ve put together a handy guide to help you understand what your parents are trying to say when they send you texts comprised of nothing but emojis.
🌄🙏🥰
Mom saw that you liked the overexposed, crooked picture of the sunset that she posted to Facebook. She is grateful, both for the glory of God’s creation, and for the fact that — however indirectly — you were briefly paying attention to her.
🍺🏀😮💨
Dad’s inviting you over to watch the Sixers blow another playoff series lead.
💦 🍆 ⬆️ 😲
Calm down. Your mom just went out to water her garden and is shocked at how well the eggplants are doing. She’s never even gotten them to fruit before!
🚲👩🏿🐎🎶
Looks like mom is doing the Megan Thee Stallion Peloton session again. She said she didn’t think she would like it, but ended up finding it catchy. She’s not crazy about the lyrics, but she can’t really hear them that well, anyway.
🎊🎉🥳🎂
Check the calendar — it’s someone’s birthday. Either that, or one of mom’s Facebook friends posted that it’s International Second Daughters Day a week ago and she just saw it in her feed.
🥳🎉🎂👻
Happy heavenly birthday, grandma.
🤔
Dad thinks these liberals are being awfully silly, and he assumes you agree!
🧠❓💁♀️😒😤
Mom’s upset that Mayim is hosting Jeopardy again. Just let her vent. She won’t be this mad again until they switch back to Ken and she can complain about his “soft voice.”
👍
This is not intended to be sarcastic or passive-aggressive. Your dad is earnestly answering the important question you asked about switching careers. Unfortunately, it wasn’t a yes-or-no question.
🏃🏃😡😡
Your mom wants to watch 2 Fast 2 Furious again. Yeah, it’s arguably the weakest entry in the series, but you know that Vin Diesel’s voice makes her uncomfortable.
👰🤵💒👶🔫
Mom thinks your cousin Alan is only getting married because his girlfriend is pregnant, despite there being no evidence for any of that. There’s a 50% chance that this is just a preamble to a discussion of your recent weight gain.
😊
Dad accidentally tapped one of the auto-reply options. He will vehemently deny that this happened.
😸😽😹😺😻😾😿🙀
Mom just discovered the cat face emojis.
This article is satirical. The Hard Times is a punk/hardcore satire site. All content should be considered parody and entertainment purposes only.
