FAIRBANKS, Alaska — Obvious alcoholic and general mess of a human being Jerrold Long announced today that he will spend…
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PARIS — Local legend and longtime Notre-Dame resident Quasimodo will now be known as “The Hunchback of Holiday Inn” after…
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PHILADELPHIA — The Pennsylvania State Legislature introduced a bill this week proposing an additional tax on violent video games, in…
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LOS ANGELES — In an effort to bolster declining viewership, the six-time Super Bowl-winning New England Patriots will perform during…
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NEW YORK — Emaciated Rockstar Games’ programmer, Cassie Collier, revealed to Kotaku writer Jason Schreier that every tombstone in the…
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CHICAGO — Noted rhythm-and-blues singer Robert Sylvester “R.” Kelly announced the impending release of an all-new hostage today, undercover police…
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ASHLAND, Ore. — A throng of mourners were reportedly horrified yesterday when it was revealed that Ajay Bhatt, inventor of…
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No matter how many gallons of twenty-somethings’ blood we inject, everybody still gets old and shitty. That goes double for…
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BELLEVUE, Wash. — In response to a number of controversial games being sold on their store, Valve has updated its…
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Success in the music industry is less about talent and more about who you know. More specifically, it’s about who…
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