Opinion: It’s Time to Call It the Boomer Table
It sucks being home for the holidays as an unmarried, childless person; the interrogating questions from relatives about my future,…
Read More →
Jonah Nink — Page 8
93 stories found
End of an Era: I Just Hit Bob Dylan With My Car
The genre defining career of Bob Dylan was brought to an abrupt and tragic end just moments ago after the…
Read More →
I Went as Myself for Halloween Because What I Have Become Is Scarier Than Any Monster
What you have all done to Halloween is disgusting. Everywhere I turn people are dressed up in ‘sexy’ costumes and…
Read More →
Paper Skeleton to Headline Local Library’s Bulletin Board
GARY, Ind. — Local librarian Kate Frazier announced earlier today that a paper skeleton will headline the Halloween decorations on…
Read More →
Opening Gladiator Asks to Borrow Headliner’s Trident, Big Net
ROME — Debuting gladiator Felix Augustus had to borrow weapons yesterday from a more established warrior ahead of his opening…
Read More →
Top 10 Blink 182 Songs That – Ok Now That the Boomers Are Gone, How Do We Get Rid of Them Permanently Before They Destroy the Planet?
Nothing beats a good Blink 182 song, here is our top 10 list. 10. Mutt - This Enema of the…
Read More →
Meet the Man Who Backpacked Across the Entirety of Nick Cave’s Forehead
Kempton Jones, a backpacking enthusiast from Iowa, has done what many once considered impossible. After a year-long journey across nearly…
Read More →
Psychedelic Blues Band Lineup Made up Entirely of Sideburns
MILWAUKEE — Up-and-coming psychedelic blues band Sharp Shave, made up entirely of human-sized, anthropomorphic sideburns, drew dozens of Wisconsinites to…
Read More →
God Confirms Bible Takes Place in ‘Spy Kids’ Universe
LOS ANGELES — After years of speculation, God finally confirmed at a press conference today that the events of the…
Read More →
I Thought This Couple “Looking for a Third” on Tinder Wanted a Three-Way but Now I’m in a Rush Tribute Band
Call me old fashioned but when I first saw that Tim and Annie Lebowitz were “looking for a third” on…
Read More →