We Sat Down With the Wrong Flogging Molly and Now We Owe $600 to an Irish Dominatrix
OK, so apparently our new intern Caleb is completely full of shit. We hired him because he said he could…
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Alex Salcido
17 stories found
Punk Rushes to Free Cigarettes Out of Hot Car
PHOENIX — Local punk Frankie “Bullet” Higgins is quietly and privately working through the trauma of leaving his Yellow American…
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Tragic: Hot Person Loves Jesus
PORTLAND, Ore. — Ridiculously attractive man and recent Milwaukee transplant Josh Billingsley left dozens disappointed today after confirming that he…
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We Sit Down With Legendary Chart-Toppers “Various Artists”
No matter how old you are or where you’re from, you likely grew up listening to iconic chart-topping kings, "Various…
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Hydroxychloroquine Transforms President Trump Into Cool Alter Ego “Donny Love”
WASHINGTON — President Trump’s experimental use of the anti-malarial drug Hydroxychloroquine has transformed the Commander-in-Chief from a boorish, morbidly obese,…
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Carfax Fox Diagnosed With Coronavirus
NEW YORK — The Carfax Car Fox TV mascot shocked the world this past Monday as the latest to be…
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I Will Defeat Fascism Once I Find a Sharpie for This Banjo
Government oppression has tightened its grip on our nation. The signs pointing to fascism’s rise have never loomed greater. The…
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Punk Dad Discovers They Make Pedialyte for Kids Now
TRENTON, N.J. — Part-time dad and full-time punk Cody Heckyls discovered yesterday, when seeking flu remedies for his two-year-old son,…
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How Going Broke Helped Me Get Sober
Hitting the bottle a little too hard? It seems everyone is getting on the wagon these days and the general…
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Ranking the Top 5 Podcast Costumes You’ll Have to Explain All Night
Halloween is right around the corner and you want to stand out. Every year we see the same old costumes-…
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