SAN FRANCISCO — The absolute worst person you know has unfortunately happened upon the phrase “living my truth” and is currently on a rampage throughout the region justifying every single thought and action by weaponizing the aforementioned buzz phrase common in misappropriated therapy jargon, confirmed sources.
“Look, I am all in favor of people living authentically, whatever that means,” you said. “Expressing yourself is important, but this person has been nothing but rude since we started working together, and now they just blurt out insane thoughts at meetings and speak in sentences that sound like the worst advice you’ve ever seen on some random dipshits Instagram. Also, they yelled at the person who delivered the office lunch the other day because ‘hunger was guiding their emotional wellbeing’ or some shit? Unreal.”
When asked about their alleged sociopathic tendencies since learning of the phrase, the worst person you know was quick to respond.
“First of all, your accusation isn’t in alignment with me, okay? It makes me feel dysregulated and that’s literally violence. Second of all, I didn’t hear that from therapy because therapy is for pussies and also backed by big pharma. Also, I don’t know who you’ve been talking to about me, but I’m going to find out and then I’m gonna slash their tires because anyone with anything negative to say about me is trying to use their toxicity to dull my shine. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have an entrepreneur’s conference to attend.”
Former clinical psychologist Amanda Ruthkin has had just about enough of these types of phrases.
“Regrettably, this is all too common behavior,” said Ruthkin. “I actually had to quit my job over this garbage because it’s become very fashionable to not do any meaningful inner work at all, grab the nearest distilled nonsense that already agrees with your terrible personality but is phrased in a way that sounds like growth, and then just use it to become an even shittier person while simultaneously thinking that you’re an enlightened being. I’m not surprised at all to learn that the worst person I know is up to this behavior.”
At press time, the worst person you know was seen adding “empath” to their Instagram bio.
