SOUTH HADLEY, Mass. — Freebird Rock n’ Roll Camp counselor Shea Dowd was thrilled to gather his campers around the fire to tell a rock n’ roll ghost story about a headless bass that is said to roam the grounds, according to a bunch of freaked out kids.
“We used to tell regular ghost stories,” said Dowd excitedly, “but the kids seemed bored. At some point we started focusing on rock-themed spooky stories, which worked much better. The biggest hit is the Legend of the Headless Bass. It’s about a bass player who was decapitated in a horrible accident, along with his cherished instrument. When we tell it, another counselor hiding in the woods starts playing the bassline from ‘Bela Lugosi’s Dead.’ At the climax of the story, the counselor leaps from the shadows slapping away on a headless Steinberger. The kids just lose their minds.”
Some parents like Helen White are concerned that stories like these are not appropriate for the young campers.
“I sent my daughter to the camp to learn guitar, not to be exposed to Satanism and witchcraft,” said White. “Those stories scare her. She doesn’t need all this evil nonsense, she just wants to be able to play with the country gospel group at church. I shouldn’t have ever let her go to a place associated with that devil music. I wanted to send her to the Christian Country Music Camp, but they had to close it down last year because…well, nevermind why. Rock music is bad, that’s all.”
Cultural anthropologist and folklorist Lester Guest, who has been traveling the country collecting musical ghost stories for an upcoming anthology, weighed in with their expertise.
“Each region I’ve visited has its own flavor of story,” said Guest, leafing through a dusty, leather-bound volume. “For instance, in New Orleans I found a surprising number of tales about haunted trombones. I’ve heard legends of the spirit of Bob Stinson appearing at Minneapolis’ 7th Street Entry, smashing pint glasses and detuning guitars. And In Los Angeles, many of the stories feature Darby Crash’s strung-out ghost asking for change. The Legend of the Headless Bass is a classic East Coast tale, for sure.”
As of press time, Dowd was allegedly narrating the story of a haunted house that was built on top of an ancient Line 6 burial ground.