WASHINGTON — President Biden revealed that the United States reached a new milestone in global dominance and is just one military base on foreign soil…
KENT, Conn. — Former diplomat, and noted war criminal, Henry Kissinger died at his home yesterday reportedly of a broken heart brought on by the…
JERUSALEM — The Israeli government and Hamas agreed to a humanitarian ceasefire after the IDF realized needed time to receive more missiles from the United…
GAZA CITY — Teen fandom magazine Tiger Beat sent novice 16-year-old journalist Palmer Fredricks to Gaza for live reporting, confirmed sources who didn’t know the…
Well, guys, I’m honestly so shocked and upset right now. I just got another breaking news notification on my phone about the Israel-Hamas war. Ugh.…
Nuclear war. It’s been the backdrop for countless movies, and video games and served as the #1 looming threat that causing loss of sleep in…
LAKEWOOD, Ohio — Local pit boss Ralph MacQuery created a sense of chaos and turmoil when he suddenly hoisted a lost shoe above the pit…
BETHESDA, Md. — Military weapons developer and defense contracting behemoth Lockheed Martin announced that it is holding a DIY-style fundraiser to raise money specifically for…
WASHINGTON — Your parents, who have spent every waking moment for the past 20 years preparing for the end of humanity, once again asked when…
War. What is it good for? Well, occasionally it can inspire some pretty so-so punk melodies at the mere cost of a few thousand human…
PETALUMA, Calif. — Indie/jangle pop band Diet Water vowed that they will never play a show in Israel out of support of Palestine, though peers…
WASHINGTON — Average consumers are feeling the pinch both metaphorically and literally as rising gas prices have resulted in them having to give up twice…
LANGLEY, Va. — American intelligence analysts are increasingly fearful that Putin’s mental situation is worsening after a statement to Russian state media about what constitutes…
WASHINGTON — President Joe Biden signed an executive order immediately dispatching 5,000 scrappy, Italian-American, mush-mouthed boxers to pose a metaphorical threat to the Russians who…
IOWA CITY, Iowa — Promoters at a recent local show agreed that they would bump the door fee up three dollars for any individual who…