DES MOINES, Iowa — Newest member of Slipknot Brett Francese found himself struggling to look busy during his first day on the job, sources report.…
Nu-Metal Act Completely Ostracized From Local Scene for Spelling Their Band Name Correctly
By Steve Packosky
TALLAHASSEE, Fla. — Nu-metal band Deranged found themselves the pariah of their local scene for failing to misspell their band name, sources report. “I wish…
Owner of Dimly Lit Factory Getting Really Sick of Nu-Metal Bands Sneaking In to Film Music Videos
By Steve Packosky
BAY CITY, Mich. — President of R&L Composites Inc. Stan Bratonski had just about enough of nu-metal bands breaking into his factory after hours to…
BAKERSFIELD, Calif. — Local Korn fan Floyd Brennan recently admitted that the band hit its peak approximately 50 seconds into the song “Blind,” confirmed sources…
Clown From Slipknot Makes New Year’s Resolution to Hit a Beer Keg With His Baseball Bat at Least 50 Times a Day
By Steve Packosky
DES MOINES, Iowa — Slipknot percussionist Shawn “Clown” Crahan reportedly resolved to hit a beer keg with his baseball bat at least 50 times a…