We really wanted to challenge ourselves, so we’re going to rank every Deftones album from worst to best. Though this is no easy feat considering how remarkably consistent the band has been throughout their entire career. If you’re really willing to get down to a granular level with us, or if you’re just really, really horny, then we can take this journey together, and prove to haters once and for all that Deftones are more than just a brand of weed that’s sold in the SOCAL Market.
9. Saturday Night Wrist (2006)
Some die-hard Deftones fans may disagree with this one, but in terms of consistency, “Saturday Night Wrist” leaves a lot to be desired. The entire experience from front to back is similar to combining a diet of nuts and cheese with equal parts Miralax. There are stunning moments of clarity in the form of bangers, but beware… there will be times when you find yourself biting down on a piece of slate while waiting for certain movements to pass.
Play it again: “Beware” for its powerful falsetto moaning that soars acrobatically through your headphones in a stunning call and response.
Skip it: “Pink Cellphone,” because none of us want to go to the Hot Carling Academy for a whiff of butt-fucking residue.
8. Adrenaline (1995)
Though a solid album in its own right, “Adrenaline” is more of a proof of concept than anything else. It’s moody. It’s heavy. It’s even atmospheric at times! And if dressing like the Crow before a night of unrelenting bondage sex is your style, then you’ll be pleased to know that the b-side from this album, “Teething,” was featured prominently on the “City of Angels” soundtrack.
Play it again: “Bored,” because come on, this is the song that introduced many of us to Deftones, and it’s simply a classic.
Skip it: “Nosebleed,” we get it, you do lots of cocaine.
7. Gore (2016)
“Gore” is an album that requires patience, but has great payoffs. To date, it’s Deftones’ most ambitious and experimental album. But in terms of replay value, there is a place and time for “Gore.” And that place and time is your couch after about 500mg of edibles. Though its inherent weirdness should not be considered a turnoff by any stretch of the imagination, you really have to be in the mood for this one, which is why it ranks lower than other efforts.
Play it again: “Hearts/Wires,” because TEXTURE!
Skip it: “Gore,” the chorus just reminds us of a terrifying game of hide-and-seek.
6. Ohms (2020)
“Ohms” is the follow-up to “Gore,” and Deftones’ most recent album at the time of this article. Chino’s vocals are in top form, Sergio’s bass rips through your speakers like a buzzsaw, Abe Cunningham relentlessly beats the absolute fuck out of his drums, Frank Delgado’s instinct for texture is intimidating, and Stefan Carpenter reaches his final form because he’s using a 19 string guitar or something at this point. In a way, “Ohms” is the perfect follow-up to “Around the Fur” if you forget about the other six albums in between.
Play it again: “Error,” drum assault at the end.
Skip it: “…This Link is Dead,” borderline rap-metal, and we thought they were past this.
5. Koi No Yokan (2012)
Translating to “feeling of love,” “Koi No Yokan” boasts a crisp, yet lush production that assaults your ears. But for all the abrasive and meteoric highs that this album has, it’s got ballads too. If you ever find yourself slow dancing to this album, you’re definitely gonna get fingered, so make sure you loosen the snap buckle belt on your cargo shorts.
Play it again: “Graphic Nature,” tremendous amounts of hi-hat fuckery.
Skip it: “What Happened to You?”, “Goon Squad” would have been a better closer.
4. Diamond Eyes (2010)
This album rules because it’s a return to form after “Saturday Night Wrist.” This album also sucks because it’s the first album without Chi Cheng on bass. Sergio Vega from Quicksand, however, took on the role of bottom-feeder seamlessly, and this is definitely an album that makes a good soundtrack for eating ass.
Play it again: “Royal,” Chino stubs his toe at the end and lets out the best scream of his career.
Skip it: “CMND/CTRL,” All this computer hacking is making us thirsty.
3. Around the Fur (1997)
We love this album for its songwriting, production, sense of dynamics, and flow. We hate it because when we open the CD booklet that we haven’t organized since 2003, it sits between “Three Dollar Bill,” Y’all, and Crazytown’s “The Gift of Game.” There are tits on the cover too.
Play it again: “Lhabia,” sounds like heavy Morrissey, but you’re not afraid to listen to it in public.
Skip it: “Headup,” solid tune, but feels like a B-side
2. White Pony (2000)
Many think this album should be number one on the list, but they had to use “Back to School (Mini Maggit)” as the opening track on the US release. They shouldn’t have done that. That’s like starting off a nine-course, Michelin-rated meal with gas station egg salad. We strongly recommend starting the album with “Feiticeira,” because that’s the way God intended, and “Pink Maggit” is a superior version of “Back to School (Mini Maggit),” as well as an epic closer.
Play it again: “Digital Bath,” we’ve all had that “drown-your-lover-in-a-bathtub” fantasy at one point or another.
Skip it: “Back to School (Mini Maggit),” because.
1. Deftones (2003)
The self-titled follow-up to “White Pony” is the perfect Deftones album. It won’t bring her back, but if you crank it to maximum volume, they won’t hear you crying. It’s brutal, it’s hella sensitive, the drums sound like a cannon and beat you in the chest, and Chino took a long time to recover after blowing his voice out shrieking on this one. In other words, “White Pony” was a stunning proof of concept of what Deftones are capable of, but it was also the necessary stepping stone to lead us to this self-titled banger that is in many ways a superior album.
Play it again: “Bloody Cape,” the mothership of riffs.
Skip it: “Lucky You,” feels like an interlude; kind of neat, but the album’s fine without it.