In this day and age it can be increasingly difficult to find a good show space where everybody is welcome. Most bars and clubs are…
SACRAMENTO, Calif. — Local punk Steven Marsh botched his 23andMe test late last week after inexplicably vomiting into the DNA collection tube, a confused and…
LAS VEGAS — Scene staple Pat “P” Ott learned last night that the show they believed to be sold out actually had tickets still available…
UNITED STATES — Local white guy Trent Langlois was ready to jump right into celebrating the music video for Childish Gambino’s “This is America” for…
Prom season is here and you know what that means: A-list pop stars like Taylor Swift, Katy Perry, and Rihanna will momentarily cast their life-affirming…
WESTLAKE VILLAGE, Calif. — Guitar Center executives are planning a benefit concert to deter the chain’s impending bankruptcy, featuring 97 dudes playing the opening guitar…
SAN JOSE, Calif. — Local drummer Murphy Hartly models his intense drum sound and out-of-control drinking problem after his idol, the deceased Led Zeppelin drummer…
LITTLE ROCK, Ark. — Local man Edward Berg brought his own microphone for last week’s noncompetitive “Tuesday Karaoke Night” at the Old Frog, setting off…
With the recent spate of heinous crimes committed by members of an esoteric online community, many people are beginning to wonder “What is an incel?”…
HAMMOND, Ind. — Noise musician Elaine McCulloch’s recent unemployment following her ungraceful exit from a line cook position at a local charcuterie pub is the…
Hey! It’s me, you know, from Twitter? Remember, earlier? I retweeted an article about climate change, you called me a “liberal virgin slut,” and then…
LANCASTER, Pa. — 25-year-old punk Ricky Lewis called a press conference on Friday to admit that he had lost his grasp on popular music well…
Aries (March 21-April 19) Use that Fire sign energy to call out anyone and everyone this week, Aries. It doesn’t have to make sense, or…
NEW YORK — Subway conductor Manny Tannenbaum’s formal request to “really pump up the overdrive” of his train’s PA system was approved early this morning…
Times are tough but during days such as these, anyone can be a light in the darkness. And of all the broken souls in need…