LOS ANGELES — Local trans woman Ruby Aldorff posted a picture of herself eating a hotdog on Instagram yesterday, desperate for anyone to not have…
Have you seen the list of endangered species lately? My god, it’s like a zoo. Some of these animals clearly need to straighten up if…
WARREN, Mich. — Millennial Jamie Thorpe suffered a retail-induced panic attack yesterday after hearing several beloved bands from her youth as background music at a…
ASHEVILLE, N.C. — Self-proclaimed sapiosexual man Chad Manning reportedly finds himself attracted to or aroused by intelligent and well-informed women, but only if their opinions…
We need to save our stages, people! More importantly, we need to save our stage banter. With live music practically nonexistent, some musicians have found…
SAN FRANCISCO — Members of local punk band Loogie Howser are eager to return to their bustling itinerary of playing nearly three shows a year,…
California’s reign as the greatest state on Earth is fading fast with podcast hosts and business magnates alike abandoning ship for drier pastures. Apparently, Texas…
FORT LAUDERDALE, Fla. — A proposed presidential library for disgraced former President Trump is expected to feature the world’s largest vintage VHS pornography collection, organizers…
“I’m afraid you will never walk again.” Those words refused to take meaning for me. As Dr. Albert Green leafed through his papers explaining which…
CHICAGO — PUSHback frontman Chris Sheppard is now completely unrecognizable to his close friends and peers after not having gone to the gym throughout the…
LAS VEGAS — Desperate 40-year-old man Duke Durado miserably settled last week for a girl in a short skirt and appropriately sized jacket after years…
I’m not against people making a living wage in this country, but to make it $15 an hour for a menial job is downright un-American!…
COLUMBUS, Ohio — Self-proclaimed “producer” and OSU alum Noah Steele is suing Riverside Methodist Hospital today following the unauthorized removal of a festival wristband that’s…
WASHINGTON — America’s first-born males made a stunning about-face to decades of tradition yesterday by announcing they will no longer buy alcohol for siblings younger…
It’s safe to say that COVID changed everything. Life as we used to know it feels like a distant memory and it’s hard not to…