HANNA, Alberta — Rock band Nickelback reportedly dismissed swirling rumors that their new album “Geopolitical Quantum: An Analysis of Cosmic Diplomacy” was generated by AI and insisted the music was the result of their own profound genius, sources confirmed.
“AI? Come on. Real Nickelback fans can tell I’ve had an insatiable curiosity for quantum phenomena and their implications on global affairs ever since we dropped ‘Rockstar,’” said lead singer Chad Kroeger while watching Youtube clips of the Power Slap competition. “I can assure you this album is nothing but organic Kroegerian intellect, baby. Daniel, our drummer, even hand-painted the cover! He only put that DALL-E watermark in the bottom corner to serve as a metaphor about robots and the government, obviously.”
Many fans were taken aback by the album’s jarring left turn, straying from Nickelback’s signature themes.
“I miss the simpler days when their music was about partying or falling in love or exuding sheer joy over that beer in your hand,” said longtime fan Ed Tremaine. “Do they really expect me to pump my fist to a song that uses the word ‘sojourns’ seventeen times? There’s not even a single mention on the entire album of standing in a circle with your lifelong pals while sharing cold beers and stories of the good ol’ days! And have you seen the tracklist? You want me to believe they wrote a song titled ‘Sorry, I Cannot Complete That Request’? This just isn’t the Nickelback I know!”
Quantum physicist Dr. Francesca Caldwell praised Nickelback for uncovering several new theories about anti-matter.
“Nickelback not only created a groundbreaking piece of buttrock, but they’ve also revolutionized our understanding of the universe,” said Dr. Caldwell. “The sheer brilliance of these revelations go far beyond the capabilities of an artificial intelligence. Thanks to Nickelback, intricate problems previously thought unsolvable will be solved with efficiency, interstellar exploration will be revolutionized tenfold, and we are significantly closer to understanding the mysteries of our vast universe. Fuck, that album is fire.”
As of press time, Nickelback announced their next album will refute Einstein’s theory of relativity, and they expect to complete it in just one fifteen-minute studio session.