PORTLAND, Maine — Metalcore frontman and obvious liar Zander Dekay claimed at a show last Friday that he “can’t hear the motherfuckers in the back” of the venue despite their wild shouts, hoarse and angry fans confirmed.
“I feel like this guy is jacking my fucking chain — we in the back are just as loud as the people up front,” said long-time fan Rendolyn Fae shortly after Dekay’s band Sunrise Never left the stage. “This venue really isn’t that big. I know he had to have heard us, too, because when we started screaming, the guitar player gave us the devil horns. So he fucking heard us. I feel like I’m being gaslighted here.”
The controversy has spread to social media, with #YouCanHearUs trending over the weekend — prompting Dekay to release a statement on his Instagram.
”I care about my fans. But when I ask if they’re ‘ready to rock,’ or if they’d like to ‘hear one off our first album,’ I need more than just a round of applause or a lousy ‘woo.’ I’m up on that stage baring my soul for you people — the least you could do is a high-pitched scream,” said Dekay. “I really think the people attending our show on Friday need to take a hard look in the mirror and realize that maybe you weren’t as loud as you think you were.”
Experts, including Duke University physicist Allegra McGregor, who has dedicated her career to studying frontmen, believe Dekay is clearly to blame.
“The data shows that when a frontman asks the audience if they’re ‘feeling good tonight,’ he hears them loud and clear,” said McGregor. “We have dedicated countless man-hours logging the acoustic properties of mid-level venues across the country, and it’s quite easy to hear people in the back. Our only guess is that maybe Mr. Dekay was trying to boost his own ego by demanding the audience follow his orders, but that is something we have yet to study.”
To make peace with their fans, Sunrise Never is using the popular quiz app Kahoot!, where concertgoers can vote “yes” or “no” in real time on whether they are “ready to rock,” completely eliminating the need to scream during shows.