WASHINGTON — President Trump urged his MAGA base to boycott Bruce Springsteen’s entire music catalog except for “I’m on Fire” in a Truth Social post early this morning.
“Bruce Springsteen, who looks like a DRIED UP PRUNE, has only produced ONE good song in his life. It was a favorite of my friend Jeffery and holds a special place in my heart, but everything else he’s done STINKS!” said the President. “Maybe if the ‘Boss’ had written more songs about hot young American women with daddy issues, he could have performed at Maralago, but instead he decided to contract TRUMP DERANGEMENT SYNDROME and completely TANK his career. Thank you for your attention to this matter – President DJT.”
At press time, Trump was reportedly adding “I’m on Fire” to a playlist including Chuck Berry’s “Sweet Little Sixteen,” Ted Nugent’s “Jailbait,” and, for some reason, Luciano Pavarotti’s version of “Ave Maria”.
This is a breaking story, and we’ll have more as it develops.
