Whether it’s “Talk Dirty to Me,” “Every Rose Has Its Thorn,” or “Nothin’ But a Good Time,” chances are you’re familiar with iconic glam rockers, Poison. The Hard Times was lucky enough to score an exclusive interview with these legends. Well, the ones who are still with us, of course.
The Hard Times: Wow, it’s amazing to even be in the same room as you guys. How are you all holding up?
Bret Michaels: Thanks so much for having us. I’m doing great. I’ve been on the reality TV circuit and I try to relax whenever I can.
Rikki Rockett: I’m hanging in there as always. Drumming at my age really takes it out of you.
I bet. I know it must be hard sitting here, especially after what happened to Bobby Dall.
Bobby Dall: I’m right here.
Oh, shit, sorry. I, uh, thought you, um, couldn’t make it in today. You okay?
Bobby Dall: I mean, yeah? I had back surgery but that was like 24 years ago.
Of course, yeah, that’s what I meant. I must have forgotten it was so long ago. Time flies. Anyway, you lot have had some infamous altercations over the years, including fights on stage and near-breakups. I wanted to ask. Are there any arguments with past members you regret?
C.C. DeVille: Ha! Yeah, most of those were my fault.
Bret Michaels: He was a real handful back in the day.
Right, absolutely. I actually meant something along the lines of things you may have said to some other members that you can’t take back or tell them you’re sorry now.
Rikki Rockett: Oh, we’re still in touch with Matt Smith and Richie Kotzen. They’re good guys.
And, um, they’re… in good health?
Bret Michaels: Yes?
Oh. What about the other guitarist?
C.C. DeVille: You mean Blues? Yeah man, he’s fine. He left on good terms. Apparently, he’s super into yoga and stuff now.
Rikki Rockett: I think he’s vegan, too.
That’s… that’s good news. Moving on! Do you think you’ll all ever be able to do another tour like you did in 2022, especially after what’s happened?
Bret Michaels: What’s happened?
C.C. DeVille: Did someone die?
Bobby Dall: I think they’re still stuck on my surgery.
Okay, look, I definitely was under the impression that at least one of you guys had kicked the bucket. It’s statistically likely. You are a hair metal band from the sunset strip after all.
Bret Michaels: We’re actually from Mechanicsburg, PA.
But weren’t you guys ripping lines of cocaine and driving drunk throughout the glory days of your career?
Poison: Yep.
After several minutes of silence, C.C. DeVille told me to go fuck myself before punching both me and Bret Michaels in the face for “good measure.”