I had an extremely toxic relationship with social media for years, but I’ve finally whittled it down to just one perfectly curated Instagram consisting of adorable dogs, movie nostalgia pages, and plus-sized adult actresses’. All of the dopamine, none of the drama! That is, until recently. It seems my perfectly customized digital bubble has been burst, now that it’s come to my attention that this guy Kevin I know follows one of my favorite pornstars. And really, it makes sense that he follows pornstars on Instagram, the guy is a total creep!
I seriously don’t understand why Instagram insists on showing you when “friends” interact with posts on your feed. Now I’m burdened with the knowledge that some loser creepo perv like Kevin is gooning over the same picture of Estella Bathory’s ass as I am. Really kills the vibe!
Just look at the way this asshole interacts with them. Commenting with just the peach, squirt, and heart eyes emojis? Completely tasteless, I would never do that. When I am particularly aroused by a photo a pornstar posts to Instagram I show my appreciation by commenting something simple and elegant, like just the word “Divine” or “Breathtaking.” It’s called class Kevin, look it up!
It sickens me to think someone might assume I have anything in common with some sketchball like Kevin just because we happened to like the same photo of an Asian teenager dressed as Velma Dinkly looking for her glasses in a suggestive manner. Someone I know could stumble across that post, see that I liked it, and then see that Kevin also liked it, and get the idea that I’m some sort of weirdo like him.
I want to put this out there to any adult models who may be concerned—if this creep Kevin is bothering you in your DMs, you just let me know sweetheart, and I’ll straighten it out. Just reply to one of my DMs where I’m telling you how beautiful you are but it’s totally cool that you’re not replying to me. I send some version of that out about once a week so it should be easy to find. Or if you just need an empath to talk to, or whatever!
Wait, Kevin has “empath” in his bio too? Jesus, what a fucking predator!