Quiz: Do You Want To Run a Marathon or Do You Want Your Friends To Pay Attention to You?
You’re starting to feel adrift. What do you want to do with your life? Should you start a podcast? It…
Read More →
Sarah Cassell
8 stories found
Nice! Woman Who Called You Homophobic Slurs in High School So Excited to See Chappell Roan
BOSTON – Local bully Veronica Coughlin, who took immense joy in calling classmates homophobic slurs in high school, is reportedly…
Read More →
Did You Hear About Our Old Neighbor? Yeah, He’s Dead. (Guest Column by Your Mom)
Hey honey, thanks for calling! How are you doing? Is work good? Yes, yes I’m doing well here. I went…
Read More →
Punk Wonders What the Hell Boss Could Want at 1 p.m. on a Tuesday
WASHINGTON – Local punk Rene Johnson was absolutely gobsmacked and quite offended after he got a Slack notification from his…
Read More →
Boyfriend Plans Romantic Evening Out At Friend Brett’s House
RENO, Nev. — Local boyfriend Zach Dornan planned a romantic evening out for him and his girlfriend Lizzie Hart at…
Read More →
Why Becoming a Roomba Mother Convinced Me of the Need for Paid Family Leave
I never understood paid family leave. If people want time off to relax and sit around then they shouldn't have…
Read More →
Punk Missing Time He Could Get All His Friends Sick With No Backlash
SEATTLE — Local punk Brock Riley admits that he yearns for days when he could spread every illness under the…
Read More →
Local Man Adds ‘Happy International Women’s Day’ To His 2 AM ‘U Up?’ Text
DAYTON, Ohio — Self-described 'investor and former plaintiff in a PAC 12 rowing/college admissions scandal, Braden Wade, embarked on a…
Read More →