MAGA Protesters Set Police to Easy Mode
WASHINGTON — Protesters have stormed the Capitol Building in Washington D.C. after setting the local police to “easy mode.” “We…
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Jeremy Kaplowitz
362 stories found
When Asked What Han Solo’s Favorite Color Is, Harrison Ford Says “I Wish George Lucas Would Die”
Whoa!! We have huge news for Star Wars fans because Han Solo actor Harrison Ford did a TELL-ALL interview with…
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Snickering CD Projekt Red Executive Announces Cyberpunk Switch Port
WARSAW — Executives at CD Projekt Red couldn’t contain their giggling while announcing an upcoming Cyberpunk 2077 port coming to…
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Long-Lost Father Coming to Fortnite
CARY, N.C. — Epic Games has announced that the new DLC character coming to their hit battle royale video game…
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It’s Time to Admit That All TV Remotes Should Be Controllers
As our technology gets better and better, people become attached to the familiar. Old interfaces become the preferred, retro designs…
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Tom DeLonge Brainstorming Words That Rhyme With “Monolith”
SAN DIEGO — Former Blink 182 guitarist Tom DeLonge reportedly spent the last six days brainstorming words that rhyme with…
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Elon Musk Announces He’s Raising His Son Without Pronouns or Friends
SAN FRANCISCO — Tesla, Inc. CEO Elon Musk announced today that he will be raising his son X Æ A-Xii…
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CD Projekt Red Clarifies That Any Racist Content Found in Cyberpunk Is Probably Just a Glitch
WARSAW — CD Projekt Red has confirmed that anything racist that players may find in their game Cyberpunk 2077 is…
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Why My Shitty Dead-End Office Job Means No Video Game Developer Should Complain Ever
As video games become an even larger part of our culture, the conversation over overtime work, employee crunch, and unions…
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‘Hades’ Video Game Inexplicably Wins TIME’s 2020 Person of the Year
NEW YORK — TIME Magazine has shocked the world, announcing today that their 2020 Person of the Year is inexplicably…
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