“Bob’s Burgers” Characters Ranked by How Likely They Are To Get a Terrible Face Tattoo
Face tattoos are the ultimate sign of someone who doesn't give a shit, or doesn't realize how stupid a face…
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Brandon Talley
5 stories found
Barrel Shortage Forces Craft Breweries to Use Actual Tables
PORTLAND, Ore. — Breweries across the Pacific Northwest are faced with barrel supply chain issues forcing them to utilize a…
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Man Can’t Decide Whether To Pronounce Foreign Word Like an Asshole or an Idiot
OAKLAND, Calif. — Local man Jeff Beeswick reportedly can’t decide whether to pronounce foreign words like some sort of pompous…
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Historians Now Confident Jesus Also Turned Water Into Strawberry Coconut Hard Seltzer
JERUSALEM — Biblical scholars were stunned by a newly discovered set of ancient scrolls that suggests Jesus not only turned…
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Local Man Pretty Certain Nobody Can Tell He Also Uses His Mask as Napkin
LOS ANGELES — Local man Peter Thurman is pretty certain nobody can tell he frequently uses his COVID mask as…
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