BUFFALO, N.Y. — Legendary death metal band Cannibal Corpse shocked fans and anyone with eyes recently with the revealing of their most horrific, disgusting and visceral album cover yet which features average, regularly prepared British cuisine, puke-stained camo short-clad sources report.
“I can get down with stuff like the corpse cunnilingus on the cover of ‘Tomb of the Mutilated’ or the grisly shit on the ‘Gallery of Suicide’ cover, but black pudding and jellied eels? No fucking way,” longtime Cannibal Corpse fan Patrick Yeung stated. “I’ll just say that the masters of death metal have truly outdone themselves, without even using any drawings of severed penises or rotting zombies and it’s that’s pretty impressive. I don’t think I’ll ever get the image of baked beans in soggy bread out of my brain ever again.”
Cannibal Corpse vocalist George “Corpsegrinder” Fisher knew it was time to take their reputation for being the world’s most gruesome band to the next level.
“The controversial covers of our previous 18 albums are basically Norman Rockwell paintings compared to the one on our new ‘Mushy Peas Massacre’ record,” Fisher explained while clutching an impossibly large amount of stuffed animals. “We decided that after 35 years, gore has been played out. So we thought about what makes people actually barf? After our last gig in England we had one bite of deviled kidneys and we knew this would gross out more people more than any amount of bloody cum ever could, and it’s working perfectly.”
Many death metal experts agree that this is just the next step in the evolution of the genre.
“Year after year, death metal bands constantly try to outdo the obscenities of their contemporaries, almost like that’s more important than the integrity of their music,” death metal historian Rachel Mills-Leech stated. “If you think the gross-out factor of disgusting English food is high, wait until you see the picture of Chris Barnes’ face Six Feet Under is using for their next cover. Excuse me, I think I’m going to be sick just imagining it.”
At press time, Cannibal Corpse claimed the infamous album cover has already placed them on many countries’ banned lists worldwide.