August 2018 - Page 3 of 12

Patrick Coyne • August 26, 2018

Well it happened again. You’re irrationally angry and contemplating murder. Everyone feels the urge to kill at least once or…

Gerry Todd • August 26, 2018

TUKWILA, Wash. — Tukwila musicians of all genres are mourning today after the town’s only competent drummer, Jeffrey Joyce, announced…

Julia Platz-Halter • August 25, 2018

WASHINGTON — A new report by the Department of Health and Human Services confirmed today that the online friends you…

Nicky Martin • August 25, 2018

GRAYSLAKE, Ill. — At the end of a twelve hour stream last night, Manson Prate, known to his Twitch followers…

Mark Roebuck • August 25, 2018

TUCSON, Ariz. — A local show’s merch line was held up last night for more than 11 minutes when aging…

Ella Gale • August 24, 2018

LOS ANGELES — Local goth Jenny Carlisle successfully subverted cosmetic trends earlier this week by having her asshole professionally darkened…

Lauren Lavín • August 24, 2018

Stephen Patrick Morrissey has touched thousands of fans, figuratively speaking. Vegans love him. Your one friend who still wears Members…

M.J. Amory • August 24, 2018

NEW YORK — The 42nd Street/Times Square subway station was tight on space early yesterday evening after Rush drummer Neil…

Mark Roebuck • August 23, 2018

SAINT PAUL, Minn. — Tragedy struck today as the first public showcase of the self-driving car invented by infamous video…

Ted Kindig • August 23, 2018

All across the internet, a dangerous idea is taking hold. To its passionate, demographically consistent, very “online” base of fanatical…

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