cig Archives - HARDTIMES

Man Rolls Own Cigarettes In Order to Save Money and Look Like Complete Asshole

John Danek • April 28, 2023

SANTA CRUZ, Calif. — Insufferable penny-pinching hipster Paul Sandor recently began the cost-cutting and dickhead-looking practice of rolling his own…

Studies Confirm Average Punk Eats Between Five and Seven Cigarettes in Their Sleep Annually

Matt Bieker • November 29, 2022

PHILADELPHIA — Researchers at Johns Hopkins University confirmed the average American punk consumes a half-dozen cigarettes in their sleep throughout…

Punk Boy Scout 1 Cig Away From Earning Nicotine Patch

Kate Howard • February 20, 2021

CHAUNCEY, Ohio — 11-year-old Boy Scout Albie Tamari is reportedly just one cigarette away from earning the highly esteemed Nicotine…