At last, the Halloween season is upon us. People are firing up their Ouija boards, black cat adoptions are at their seasonal peak, and pretending…
In a way, we’re thankful to whoever tried to ram Christianity down Glen Benton’s throat during his childhood, as the end result was a chip…
Do you live in a swing state and wish you were dead from the relentless election ads? Skip all that shit (after filling out your…
As anyone without children can tell you, being a childless adult is the absolute pinnacle of human existence. It rules, it’s awesome, it’s the best.…
“The Star Spangled Banner” is as timeless as the United States of America itself. But if it’s so revered, why does it contain exactly zero…
Do you guys also feel like there is just way too much music coming out nowadays? Lucky for you, we’re here to pick a handful…
Ah, the 1900s! A time before Spotify, YouTube, smartphones, and daily school shootings. A simpler time. A more innocent time! Anyway, let’s get to the…
I’m sick and tired of catching flack for taking my emotional support dog with me everywhere I go. I have a diagnosed anxiety disorder and…
So, you’re out with your goth partner on a crisp autumn night, spade in one hand and their cold, beautifully pale hand in the other.…
The original “Twilight Zone” series is a gold mine of memorably traumatic plot twists, thirty-year-old men who look like sixty-year-old men, and some of the…
Florida is America’s punchline. And for the most part rightfully so since it has given us so many awful things and deserves the mockery. But…
As many Americans know, history started the day they entered this world and everything before that is dogshit that doesn’t matter, but what about that…
When you hear mention of extreme metal, what comes to mind? Death? Destruction? Gore? How about conventional medical terminology? If you’re new to the genre,…
Portland’s Poison Idea is a scary band. Terrifying, actually. Not in a silly corpse paint, Hail Satan! way, but more like “Jesus, these guys are…
It’s the Halloween season and we at The Hard Times are getting our novelty horror screamo band Suscreamia back together! Well, almost. As many of…