SEATTLE – Gail Glover has had the repeated misfortune of accidentally running into her ex-boyfriend Joel Buckner at McGregor’s Brewpub, the bar he’s worked at since 2017, according to multiple sources who continually beg her to drink somewhere else.
“This is so my luck, to be unable to avoid Joel almost every time I grab a drink at McGregor’s, which is conveniently only a few miles out of the way of my apartment,” Glover said, discreetly snapping a photo of the bar’s staff schedule on her phone. “I’m totally over him, like, I hardly even fantasize about him these days—I can’t even remember the names I’d picked out for our future children before he ended things. Actually, it might have been me who called things off. Hard to say, because I’m so chill about it. It’s just a super cool, chill memory that I have completely repressed from my consciousness.”
Buckner confirmed he has seen Glover at his place of employment with increasing regularity over the past several months, though he does not recall seeing her there before the two met.
“Gail doesn’t even like beer, she has a gluten thing and it really messes up her stomach. It’s not like we have much in terms of cocktails here, so I’m not really sure why she hangs around so much,” Buckner said, lowering his voice to avoid Glover overhearing him. “It’s getting kind of intense. I think she’s under the impression my coworker Janine and I are dating now, because Gail saw us talking one night after work, and the next day someone had slashed Janine’s tires.”
Relationship counselor Danielle Greer advised her clients that frequent run-ins with a former fling can be a sign that things between you are unresolved.
“Surveys have shown that many relationships include some breaks that might not be permanent, particularly when the couple lives in the same neighborhood, or if both parties just aren’t hot enough to find someone new,” Greer confirmed. “If you’re hoping to re-kindle things with a former flame, I recommend making it clear that you have no other prospects, and that while you might not have been willing to settle before, the new you is so defeated by the lack of suitable potential mates that you’ll put up with just about anything. Nothing is more relatable than someone owning the fact that they’ve completely given up.”
At press time, Glover was mortified to run into Buckner walking his dog across the street from his apartment, where she had coincidentally spent the night camped out in her Civic with a pair of binoculars.