BURLINGTON, Vt. — Senator Bernie Sanders surprised his rabid fanbase today with an announcement that he would play his classic 2016 presidential campaign in its entirety from now through the 2020 election, several sources confirmed.
“People are yearning for a time when a black man was in the White House, and we weren’t completely sick of hearing 21 Pilots on the radio,” said Sanders from his headquarters. “Some people may call it a foolish move, but I can’t think of a better time than now to reprise the campaign everyone knows me for.”
Sanders is reportedly preparing to play some of the best hits from his Democratic presidential battle against party nominee Hillary Clinton — hits that include “Medicare for All” and ”The Top One Percent Own 99 Percent of All the Wealth.”
“Oh, man… his 2016 run was fucking classic,” said self-proclaimed “Bernie Stan” Mike Davenport of Brooklyn, N.Y. “I’ve got so many memes I can repurpose — all I have to do is change Hillary’s face to Elizabeth Warren’s. I hope one of the Chapo dudes will retweet me.”
Campaign managers say Sanders’ tour will span the entire country through at the least the Democratic primaries of 2020, but early dates show he’ll hit rust belt states like Michigan and Wisconsin repeatedly.
“The working people of Flint and Green Bay have always shown me love,” said Sanders. “Always welcomed, with full venues and a place to crash — I cannot wait.”
Sanders’ detractors, however, are less than excited about his tour.
“I guess I’m just sick of the whole reunion thing,” said former fan Janice Johnson. “It’s the same shit, but the merch is twice as expensive… and that’s when all the posers who didn’t show up the first time come out.”
When asked if his reunion could end similarly to his first tour, Sanders simply said, “Never underestimate the machine.”