Ben Sobieck
•
December 14, 2025
MINNEAPOLIS — Noted Puscifer fan and parolee Peter Schwartz recently learned the vocalist of his favorite act has a side…
Read More →
Steve Packosky
•
December 10, 2025
CLEARWATER, Fla. — A gonorrhea outbreak during an outdoor Bret Michaels concert at the BayCare Sound was somehow less unpleasant…
Read More →
Steve Packosky
•
December 9, 2025
SAN DIEGO — Hatebreed fan Scott Tamowsky found inspiration in the band’s lyrics to overcome a recent charge for aggravated…
Read More →
Steve Packosky
•
December 7, 2025
WASHINGTON — A recent poll among the nation’s random drunk dipshits at the bar have declared 1991’s “Enter Sandman” the…
Read More →
Dan Kozuh
•
November 28, 2025
DES MOINES, Iowa — Legendary Iowa metal band Slipknot confirmed Monday that it is being forced to relinquish three of…
Read More →
Zack Zagranis
•
November 25, 2025
RICHMOND, Va. — Several ICE agents had their internal organs forcibly removed during a recent raid on the Slave Pit,…
Read More →
Audrey Vieira
•
November 20, 2025
AUSTIN, Texas — Members of the Record Store Owners’ Union are divided on an upcoming vote to decide whether or…
Read More →
Nathan Kamal
•
November 17, 2025
CHICAGO — William Hopper, the bassist for local metal band Cannibal Buffet, was abruptly promoted after a particularly bad streptococcal…
Read More →
Alfred Barnes
•
September 9, 2025
BALTIMORE — Black metal vocalist Ben “Plaguebearer” Rockwood wreaked havoc during Wincrest Elementary’s recent Play Day following questionable face paintings…
Read More →
Steve Packosky
•
September 8, 2025
BOSTON — An attractive woman seated across from you on the subway was probably just waiting until the right moment…
Read More →
