Jimmy Beliakoff
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March 15, 2020
LONDON — Police were called to the scene of a disturbance in the early hours of this morning, as Chris…
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NEW YORK — Sesame Street announced plans to introduce a new Muppet that is absolutely horrendous at the video game…
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Joe Klein
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March 15, 2020
BROOKLYN — Local Dungeon Master Brian Goldberg’s most recent Dungeons and Dragons session ended in controversy yesterday, after the 26-year-old…
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Jolie Darrow
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March 15, 2020
BURLINGTON, Vt. — In the wake of the COVID-19 pandemic, Senator Bernie Sanders has called on Nintendo to preemptively release…
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Jeremy Kaplowitz
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March 14, 2020
[embed]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ASw6-PLMLDM[/embed] Written by Jeremy Kaplowitz, Giovanni Colantonio, Liam O'Malley, and Jeremy Hammond. Edited by Jeremy Kaplowitz Filmed by Giovanni Colantonio…
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LD Wallace
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March 14, 2020
AUSTIN, Texas — Breaking reports from your irate friends indicate that no one has any interest in learning that weird…
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Peter Casciato
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March 14, 2020
LANSING, Mich. — Due to her familiarity with the visual indicators that a major boss battle was about to unfold,…
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Jeremy Kaplowitz
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March 14, 2020
WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump is being attacked by prominent Democrats today after he claimed he found Mew under a…
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James Webster
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March 13, 2020
WASHINGTON — At a press conference this afternoon, CDC Director Robert Redfield urged all American citizens to begin keeping audio…
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Kevin Hufe
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March 13, 2020
T’ARTHAR DESERT — A team of local heroes found themselves in distress recently, after a level 26 necroscorpion murdered beloved…
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