Dan Kozuh
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PITTSBURGH — Local man Greg Walters reportedly found the answer to all of life’s problems and challenges in the form…
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John Danek
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BURLINGTON, Vt. — Local extremely confused man Kirk Unger struggled to determine if he was hearing a live recording of…
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Matt Husser
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HOUSTON — Stranded Boeing Starliner astronauts are considering themselves lucky as a delay pushed their return back to February 2025,…
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Doug Kolic
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SIERRA VISTA, Ariz. — The National Association of Bird Lovers (NABL) finally ended years of speculation and admitted that their…
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Ben Friedman
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QUINCY, Mass. — Supermarket chain Stop & Shop announced that their stores would no longer sell cigarettes due to poor…
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Ben Friedman
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BLACK ROCK CITY, Nev. — A troubling economic report revealed that 48% of this year’s projected Burning Man attendees don’t…
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Stephen Bell
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LONDON – Negotiator Peter Franks decided to take on the much easier job of finally getting Israel to agree to…
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Patrick Coyne
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DENVER — Local man Davey Hilton was “severely bummed” upon learning his new roommate, Nina McKenna, was the “intrusive thoughts”…
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Arielle Andreano
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WASHINGTON – Experts at the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration recently claimed that depressed people will no longer have to…
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Nathan Kamal
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WASHINGTON — National Public Radio, drunk on its own power over hordes of tea-drinking listeners, announced a new series of…
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