Bob Weird Dead at 78, According To Autocorrect January 11, 2026 SAN FRANCISCO — Bob Weird, a founding member of the Grateful Dead, died at age 78 yesterday, according to autocorrect.… Read More →
Dave From Dave’s Killer Bread Inducted Into Rock and Roll Hall of Fame December 27, 2025 CLEVELAND — Dave Dahl, best known as the face and founder of Dave’s Killer Bread, was inducted into the Rock… Read More →
Puscifer Fan Shocked to Learn Vocalist Has Side Band December 14, 2025 MINNEAPOLIS — Noted Puscifer fan and parolee Peter Schwartz recently learned the vocalist of his favorite act has a side… Read More →
Punk ASMR Creator Holds Microphone Up to Bandage Slowly Peeling Off Skin December 4, 2025 MINNEAPOLIS — Paige Gerbert, known as online creator ASMR Pope Hammer, posted a viral video on her YouTube account titled… Read More →
Local Man Fatally Shot at Bus Stop Can’t Believe That Online Death Calculator Quiz From 1998 Was Right November 14, 2025 PORTLAND, Ore. — Noted music scene advocate Sean Burton was fatally shot in an incident identical to a prediction made… Read More →
Shitty Cloud Doesn’t Even Look Like an Animal or Nothing August 21, 2025 MINNEAPOLIS — The appearance of an unremarkable cloud in the sky enraged pedestrians in Uptown, prompting a police response in… Read More →
Scurvy-Ridden Band Plays Extra Shitty in Hopes Someone Throws Fruit on Stage August 14, 2025 MINNEAPOLIS — Local punk band Slice planned to play exceptionally shitty to trigger audiences to throw fruit at them in… Read More →
The Heavy Hand of Government Is Only Good When It Does Things I Like August 8, 2025 I’m a typical American. I like my THC-infused beverages cold, my mac-and-Cheetos burgers hot, and my government wielding its awesome… Read More →
Punk Guitarist Gets Pre-Denial Offer From Credit Card Company July 22, 2025 MINNEAPOLIS — Baxter Lenin, guitarist for Ketamine Chainsaw, recently received a “pre-denial offer” in the mail from Capital One, confirmed… Read More →
Trump Calls for Reparations for Families Who “Lost Their Workers” on Juneteenth June 19, 2025 WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump marked Juneteenth, the federal holiday created in 2021 commemorating the end of slavery in the… Read More →