WASHINGTON — Legendary post-hardcore band Fugazi announced they would be canceling their reunion tour because interest in the shows has been too high, confirmed sources who wouldn’t have bought tickets in the first place if they thought it would offend them.
“We didn’t want this sort of acclaim when we formed this band,” said frontman Ian MacKaye. “Fugazi was never about selling out. And that includes tickets to our shows. We love our fans, but I didn’t get into this business to make money. It’s not our brand, and I hate the fact I just used the word ‘brand’ unironically. So when our manager told us that we were practically selling out every show, I pulled the plug. No fucking way am I going to make a profit from my art. That’s why our music is available on Spotify. We make almost nothing from those streams.”
Although the news left fans disheartened, some choose to look on the bright side.
“I was stoked to see the show and even had my ‘This is not a Fugazi t-shirt’ ready to go,” said hardcore fan Morley Tompkins. “But it’s a good call on their part. After all, what’s a Fugazi show if you can’t freely move your arms around without hitting someone. And waiting in line to use the bathroom? No Fugazi fan would stand for that. Personally, I think the band should have charged more for tickets to keep out the posers. I would have happily paid $7 to see them reunite. But then again, it wouldn’t be a Fugazi show if I paid more than five bucks to get in. So it’s virtually impossible to make it work.”
Small venue owners around the country felt like they were shafted by the band’s last-minute cancellation.
“It’s a damn shame when a semi-iconic band cancels shows,” said Grady Studebakker, owner of the Yuckies venue. “Like, it was going to be the largest group of people we would have had in here! My one bartender even made up a drink for the band called the ‘Fruit-Gassy.’ I mean, it’s just carbonated fruit punch, but it would have gone gangbusters with the straight edge crowd. Turns out, Fugazi is against any kind of merch, so that drink was one of the reasons they cancelled on us. It was merch-adjacent, I guess. That bartender was immediately fired.”
At press time, Eventbrite refunded all of the tickets, totaling $430.