SEATTLE — Death Cab for Cutie Singer Ben Gibbard revealed that his seasonal depression is linked to another Seattle Mariners’ season collapsing, after holding a 10-game lead on their division in June and just missing the playoffs, confirmed similarly frustrated sources.
“I know I’m going to hit an emotional wall around the middle of September when I know I won’t be watching Mariners baseball in a month. Even seeing the colors navy and northwest green on anything triggers it and I need to quietly strum an acoustic guitar and hum to myself, usually something that ends up becoming our next single, that’s how most of ‘Narrow Stairs’ was written. ‘Cath…’ is literally about watching the Phillies win and how jealous I was of their fans,” stated Gibbard. “I can’t even begin to describe my mental state when ‘The Sound of Settling’ was released after a Mariners 93-69 season and still missed the postseason.”
Long-time Death Cab for Cutie fan Leif Malikot couldn’t help but be excited when he noticed the Mariners were once again not in the playoffs.
“Death Cab has defined my youth and now adulthood with some of the best music of the indie genre ever produced. So when it’s clear the Mariners are not going to the playoffs, and more notably after a horrendous collapse, you know Ben is cooking up some amazing jams for the near future,” exclaimed Leif. “Sometimes we get some upbeat songs and catchy riffs, but it’s when the Houston Astros are in the playoffs once again instead of the Mariners is when Ben really shines. Clearly, that’s what ‘I Will Follow You into the Dark’ is about. Can’t wait for more classics!”
Official Mariners’ mascot, Mariner Moose, thanked fans during the last game of the season at T-Mobile park and left everyone hopeful for a better campaign in 2025.
“The game of baseball is always about giving it your all at the plate! I appreciate all the kind words from fans as the players and I try to keep you pumped up with every pitch! We just want to see everyone smile and have a good time at the games,” said the mascot. “Which is why I’m asking kindly once again for Benjamin Gibbard to please stop sending me demo recordings of his songs where he threatens me and blames me for the team’s shortcomings. It was funny the first few times but I’m prepared to take legal action if it doesn’t stop.”
As of press time, Gibbard also stated that a good 75% of his music since 2008 is about his heartbreak over the Seattle SuperSonics moving to Oklahoma City.