SAN FRANCISCO — Local single woman Maya Cook is taking technology into her own hands after having become frustrated with the amount of time she spends swiping left on software engineers on dating apps, multiple sources confirm.
“Dating in the Bay Area is hard because you get all these guys who came here to make money in a soulless tech job,” said Maya Cook. “I want a man with substance, like a teacher or a firefighter with huge forearms. These techies are everywhere anyway. They might as well do something useful like help me find a hot doctor who also doesn’t want kids.”
Software engineer Kevin Clarke, whose interests include chilling and tacos, was tapped directly through a dating app to assist Cook.
“I was actually really excited when I matched with Maya. She seemed pretty and fun,” said Clarke. “But when I found out she was only interested in me so I could create a filter so she didn’t have to see software engineers on the app — that wasn’t cool. She knows that not all software engineers are the same, right? We’re unique individuals with our own interests. I thought the photo of me standing on top of a mountain in a Patagonia jacket showed that.”
Many dating apps do offer increased filtering options but not without a price, which some say may actually decrease the likelihood of finding a mate.
“Studies are showing that the more times someone swipes, the less effort they put into the subsequent interactions, so people are literally losing out on love,” said relationship expert and dating analyst Amaal Palit. “A woman with photos of herself drinking at brunch shouldn’t have to sift through a bunch of profiles before finding a man with photos of himself drinking on a boat. Having personalized filters to help people avoid guys in Punisher skull shirts or American flag anything would be game-changing for this generation.”
At press time, Cook was seen Googling “what is python.”