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Ramones or Sex Pistols? This 13-Year-Old From Denver Sets the Record Straight

We here at The Hard Times are always looking for the most cutting-edge reporters and tastemakers in the industry. During a late-night bender in the fine city of Denver we were knocking over trash cans in a nice neighborhood and found the piece you are about to read, shared in its entirety with no edits, written by a middle schooler named Ethan Combe that we hope will finally end the age-old debate of which band is better, Ramones or Sex Pistols. Enjoy.

Dear mr clements

I know I was supposed to do a book report on the outsiders but books are dumb so I wrote about whose better ramones or sex pistols

1. NAME OF THE BOOK: ramones or sex pistols

2. AUTHOR: me

3. NAME THREE FACTS ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
I have brothers
i’m no poser
im from Denver
(bonus fact: my dad sucks)

4. GENRE: punk

5. PLOT SUMMARY: the sex pistols were british which makes them cool but the ramones are brothers and I have brothers so its hard to say who was better?

6. MAIN CHARACTERS: sid vicious was a real punk because he chained a lock to his neck and never took it off. the ramones were cool and all but they wore uniforms like they were at work or something .at least the sex pistols were real punx and wore safety pins and british flags and stuff

7. WHAT WAS THE SETTING OF THE BOOK? the ramones were from new york and the sex pistols were from england. I dont know wear the ramones are from in new york and i dont know where the sex pisstols were from in england but the ramones are definitely from new york and the sex pistolls are definitely from england because they had english accents and stuff.

8. WHAT WAS THE THEME OF THE BOOK? well I thought the sex pistols invented punk rock but my brother said the ramones invented it. i dont really know who invented it but my brother said the ramones were around longer because after sid died the sex pistols quit because sid wrote most of the songs so they didn’t have anyone to write songs no more

9. NAME THREE FACTS ABOUT THE BOOK:

hey ho lets go is my favorite ramones song and my favorite sex pisstols song is god save the queen because thats the british national anthem

johnny rotten wore a nazi shirt on a talk show

My brother told me sid viscous killed his girlfriend in new york

10. HOW DID THE BOOK END? WOULD YOU RECOMMEND IT TO OTHERS? if your not a poser then i recommend the sex pistols and the ramones but if you like boring music than i don’t recommend them. I dont know who i like more but my brother says the dead kennnedys are better than both of them and hes probably right.