January 2025 - Page 12 of 12

Local Man Still Riding High Off Successfully Recommending Band in 2016

Antonio Cruise • January 1, 2025

PORTLAND, Ore. — Local resident Calvin Davenport continues to experience unprecedented levels of euphoria nearly a decade after successfully recommending…

Happy New Year! My Wife’s Leaving Me for a Puppeteer

Travis Tack • January 1, 2025

Wow, what a year it’s been! I hope this letter finds you happy, healthy, and not being cuckolded. Because I…

Chaos in Times Square as Millions of Baby Spiders Hatch From NYE Ball

Ben Friedman • January 1, 2025

NEW YORK — Chaos and panic overwhelmed Times Square after the famous New Year’s Eve ball unexpectedly hatched causing revelers…