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Cooking Mama Walkthrough Starts with Essay on Writer’s Year Abroad in Naples

LOUISVILLE, Ky. — An online tutorial for a Cooking Mama: Cook Off  level players often find themselves stuck on begins with a seemingly unrelated long description of the author’s escapades abroad. 

“It was there in the embrace of the glowing sun of North Italy that I first began to feel whole,” states the tutorial of the Fettuccini dish found in Cooking Mama: Cook Off posted to the GameFAQS website. “You can never really find yourself when you’re looking in the same places you always check. I learned to laugh in the market between my classes, and to cry when I had a screaming match with my sister a whole ocean away over Skype. Most importantly, I learned to love in the arms of a swarthy thirty-eight year old named Angelo.”

“I don’t believe I was changed by that year in Naples, I think the real me simply shed her cocoon. As they say in Naples, ‘Non parli molto bene l’italiano!’”

According to one user, Michelle Waters, she had to scroll past several paragraphs before finding the information she needed to help her get through the particularly challenging level. 

“Ugh, why does every single one of these have to start with some bullshit?” asked Waters. “The other day I was just trying to research when more Overcooked 2 DLC was coming out and every single article I found was about finding time to make dinner on the go or how to get your kids to eat healthy or something. Why would I give a fuck about any of that?” 

When notified of the reception to the walkthrough, author Denise Durns defended the piece. 

“Look, anyone can play a game, but that doesn’t make you a gamer,” said Durns, who posts on the website under the moniker EatPlayLove. “This isn’t just a walkthrough, this is my heart and soul poured out into a screen. What I learned that year with Angelo is essential in understanding the techniques needed to do this dish justice.”

Waters did answer questions regarding why she’d sought out a walkthrough for a level that was mostly moving the Wiimote in one of three ways.

Check out the newest episode of the Hard Drive podcast where we watch and discuss every episode of 1989’s The Super Mario Bros. Super Show!

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