ARKADELPHIA, Ark. — Friends of local David Bowie fan William Malloy report the young man has a completely different personality every time you see them.…
For a long time I wanted to learn about jazz, but didn’t know where to start. One day I was listening to the Twin Peaks…
GREENTOWN, Ind. — Local metalhead and harvester Jonas Fitzgerald says this year’s sorrow yield is the highest in decades, according to sources with inside knowledge…
We here at The Hard Times are always looking for the most cutting-edge reporters and tastemakers in the industry. During a late-night bender in the…
Hey metal fans, the ghost of Cliff Burton here. I’ve traversed the astral plane to call out The Hard Times. I couldn’t help but notice…
RAPID CITY, S.D. — Local punk venue The Pukebox has somehow invented the world’s first “no-ply” toilet paper as a courtesy to their guests, sources…
BOSEMAN, Mont. — Local vegan and doomsday prepper Abe Friesen stocked his basement refrigerator with 600 pounds of Impossible beef, confirmed sources. “I got a…
DETROIT — Little Caesars Arena DJ Richard King is waiting for the perfect moment to play “Welcome to the Jungle” during a Detroit Red Wings…
Hey guys, first off I have to thank you for your patience in waiting for this update. After I broke into Area 51 to find…
SAN BERNARDINO, Calif. — Local eco-punk Teddy Vasquez recently explained the benefits of green energy to a carload of friends while tossing half-a-dozen cigarette butts…
FREDERICK, Md. – A local movie theater recently removed the front rows of seats so the throngs of attending dads could watch “Napoleon” while standing…
BELLINGHAM, Wash – Former punk Langley West admits he still gets twitchy when cops are around despite having not broken the law in nearly 30…
PUEBLO, Colo. – Local downer Henry Bergen recently stopped going through the motions of pretending to wash his hands after using the bathroom, according to…
SARASOTA, Fla. — Local punk Tabitha Milner recently lit a cigarette with a match on the first try, despite the fact that a Category 2…
OKLAHOMA CITY — Punk fan Tamara Washington recently saw a perfectly smokable cigarette butt on the ground from more than 33,000 feet in the air…