AUSTIN, Texas — Guitarist Greg Ginn of Black Flag recently treated the rest of the band to a pizza party at Chuck E. Cheese after…
HONOLULU — Local skateboarding bulldog Excalibur reportedly pushes the board with his back legs instead of his front ones like a dork, according to its…
There’s no denying that the world is going to hell in a handbasket, and everyone has their opinion on why that is. Well, I’m here…
Man you guys, you’ll never believe what happened to me when I went to Amoeba Records last week! I shouldn’t say anything, but I can’t…
I don’t know why everyone always complains about how hard it is to quit smoking, I did it the first time no problem. All I…
ARKADELPHIA, Ark. — Friends of local David Bowie fan William Malloy report the young man has a completely different personality every time you see them.…
For a long time I wanted to learn about jazz, but didn’t know where to start. One day I was listening to the Twin Peaks…
GREENTOWN, Ind. — Local metalhead and harvester Jonas Fitzgerald says this year’s sorrow yield is the highest in decades, according to sources with inside knowledge…
We here at The Hard Times are always looking for the most cutting-edge reporters and tastemakers in the industry. During a late-night bender in the…
Hey metal fans, the ghost of Cliff Burton here. I’ve traversed the astral plane to call out The Hard Times. I couldn’t help but notice…
RAPID CITY, S.D. — Local punk venue The Pukebox has somehow invented the world’s first “no-ply” toilet paper as a courtesy to their guests, sources…
BOSEMAN, Mont. — Local vegan and doomsday prepper Abe Friesen stocked his basement refrigerator with 600 pounds of Impossible beef, confirmed sources. “I got a…
DETROIT — Little Caesars Arena DJ Richard King is waiting for the perfect moment to play “Welcome to the Jungle” during a Detroit Red Wings…
Hey guys, first off I have to thank you for your patience in waiting for this update. After I broke into Area 51 to find…
SAN BERNARDINO, Calif. — Local eco-punk Teddy Vasquez recently explained the benefits of green energy to a carload of friends while tossing half-a-dozen cigarette butts…