Total Loser Wears Band’s Mask to Their Show
AMITYVILLE, N.Y. — Local music fan Kyle Hartley was ridiculed at an outdoor Words Are Wind show yesterday for wearing…
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Jeremy Kaplowitz
362 stories found
Olimar Insists Red Pikmin are “Virtually Immune” to Drowning
PNF-404 — Captain Olimar insisted to a group of red Pikmin today that they need not worry while trying to…
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“This Year” By the Mountain Goats No Longer Cutting It in 2020
BLOOMINGTON, Ind. — Experts warned today that listening to the hit Mountain Goats song “This Year” is no longer enough…
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Number of Video Games Worldwide Hits Record High
WASHINGTON — Experts have released a troubling new report that the number of video games worldwide has hit a record…
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New Call of Duty Game Imagines What If Russia Attacked Own Civilians in Fictional City of PФЯҬLДИD
SANTA MONICA, Calif. — Activision announced that the next game in the Call of Duty franchise, Call of Duty: Uprising,…
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Girlfriend Has No Idea Sex Playlist Is Just Old School RuneScape Soundtrack
PHOENIX — Local girlfriend Marissa Andrews is reportedly unaware that the playlist her boyfriend put on during sex last week…
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Gamers Furious as ‘Hard Drive Magazine’ Introduces Microtransactions
NEW YORK — Gamers are furious worldwide after popular video game website Hard Drive introduced microtransactions, making exclusive articles available…
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Disney Announces ‘Hawkeye’ Show Delayed Due to No One Wanting That Shit, Come On Now
BURBANK, Calif. — Disney announced today that their Disney+ Hawkeye show has been delayed indefinitely due to issues of nobody…
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Zoom Cast Reunion of Geico’s ‘Cavemen’ Raises $17 for Charity
LOS ANGELES — The cast of ABC’s 2007 television show Cavemen reunited for a Zoom table read of an unaired…
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Former StarCraft 2 Pro Has Highest Microsoft Excel APM in Office
SAN DIEGO — Former StarCraft 2 all-star Sergio Luna reportedly has the highest actions per minute (APM) in Microsoft Excel…
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