RJ Atkinson, Author at HARDTIMES

March 16, 2026

So there I was, already late to my buddy’s house show because snipping all the plastic beer rings was taking…

March 11, 2026

SANTE FE, N.M. — A recent study revealed that America’s primary source of education has been reduced to fun facts…

March 9, 2026

EVANSTON, Ill. — A recent study out of Northwestern University confirmed that Free Throw’s iconic midwest emo anthem “Two Beers…

March 1, 2026

Well, well, well. The gang’s all here. And by “the gang,” I mean me, this awesome sex scene, and everyone…

December 17, 2025

Not to startle you, but I’m currently 8 beers deep. Which means if you’re reading this, I may already be…

September 13, 2025

PROVIDENCE, R.I. — Local over-worked teacher Jason Nance was far more interested in her class’s Career Day presentations than her…

August 20, 2025

EASTON, Md. — Local misogynist Bryce Turner is starting to suspect that he, in addition to MSNBC, are to blame…

August 9, 2025

SLEEPY HOLLOW, N.Y. — Beloved slumber icon Sleepytime Tea Bear reportedly died in an apparent house fire after falling asleep…

July 26, 2025

NEWPORT NEWS, Va. — Local doctor, and self-described nihilist, recommended more sleep for better mood, improved brain function, and a…

July 24, 2025

EVANSVILLE, Ind. — Local hardcore kid Jackson Gattis is reportedly the most athletic student at his school despite his complete…