With October nearly in the books, we decided to take a look at some of the newer variety of pumpkin flavored beverages offered up this…
ATLANTA — The popularity of Home Depot’s “12-Foot-Tall Skeleton” reached a fever pitch this year, and employees of the megastore chain were instructed to start…
GAZA CITY — Israel’s Defense Minister Yoav Gallant defended the continued bombing of Palestinian civilians by asserting Hamas leaders are hiding inside the local children,…
Halloween: just one of many holidays that, upon reaching adulthood, is little more than an excuse to get absolutely shitfuck wasted without being judged as…
NEW YORK – A recent Bloomberg report announced that Taylor Swift’s wealth is now an estimated $1.1 Billion, after her record-breaking Eras tour and left…
SPOKANE, Wash. — A 12-foot tall Home Depot skeleton found himself under a mountain of skepticism after listing his height as 14 feet on Hinge,…
Well, that concludes our paranormal investigation of your turn-of-the-century Victorian farmhouse. After using numerous spirit-locating devices and other elaborate ghost-searching tools, we’re happy to conclude…
New York — Local thirty-something punk Charles Murray is unable to settle on an official complaint about this year’s Fest, indecisive sources confirmed. “I go…
Congratulations on the newest addition to your family! As a new father, you face a classic dilemma: you want to spend time with your child…
Here at the Hard Times, we’re always willing to help out our fans, and today we’ll be responding to a fan letter sent by Jack…
CONCORD, N.H. — Local high schooler Colin Black recently expressed interest in learning to skateboard but has serious reservations because of his advanced age, sources…
Morning, dear reader. To start, we have to say the fact or opinion that The Spill Canvas is not a band, but, if we’re being…