Hi everybody, allow me introduce myself. I’m the guy at every hardcore show who freaks out if you bump into him. So DON’T FUCKING ASK…
TACOMA, Wash. — Despite his rigorous touring schedule, guitarist Marcus Lorenez still finds time to be an “inconsiderate and neglectful” member of his household, according…
There is absolutely no feeling like attending a small, intimate show. How many times have you gotten into a great band, only to go to…
DENVER — Everyone at the Death Head show last night definitely noticed you were there all by yourself, and it was “pretty fucking pathetic,” according…
PHOENIX — Netflix has ordered three separate hour-long, stand-up comedy specials from local dad Bob Cecil after his hilarious comedy performance during a family dinner…
By now just about every guy has mastered the art of giving women the Big O on their Little C. You’ve mashed that button. You’ve…
SANTA BARBARA, Calif. — Newly-formed cover band The Good Beats is having second thoughts about playing the afternoon wedding reception of Helen and Juan Garcia,…
BAKERSFIELD, Calif. — Doug McLadden declared his allegiance this morning to the original, three-piece line-up of classic punk outfit Cardinal Malaise, a band he started…
Growing up is hard and it happens so fast. It’s like one day you’re graduating from high school, and the next you’re supposed to be…
LOS ANGELES — A vintage ’70s-era McIntosh MC2100 tube amplifier, as well as several other priceless pieces of music gear in the residence of Bill…
There are no two ways about it: I’m a BOSS. Do I have to spell it out for you? B-O-S-S, BOSS! I’ve been in the…
DAVIS, Calif. — Sue and Phil Atherton were caught exchanging furtive glances last night in anticipation of the coitus scheduled for while their son is…
LOS ANGELES — Glam-rock hitmakers Buckcherry are releasing a new double-disc concept album this fall, centered around a fictional protagonist receiving a blowjob, confirmed sources…
Rescue Workers Called to Free Over 900 Instagram Users Caught In Thirst Trap
MENLO PARK, Calif. — Instagram officials were forced to call in rescue workers this past weekend after a Thirst Trap claimed over 900 users, according…