Press "Enter" to skip to content

Your Weekly Hardcoroscopes

Aries (March 21 – April 19) Feel free to take a mental health break today, Aries: you need it after all the mind games you’ve…

DIY Scene Actually Just Amish Village

PHILADELPHIA — Members of a local DIY punk scene were stunned to learn last week that a small portion of their West Philadelphia community recently…

Goth in Happy Relationship Considers Gray Sweater

CLEVELAND — Local goth Stacy “Scheherazade” Kowalski reportedly may add a light gray sweater to her otherwise black wardrobe, potentially due to her fulfilling relationship,…

Bouncer Takes Pivotal Third Look at ID

SACRAMENTO, Calif. — Local bouncer Terry Brawn initiated an important and revealing third look last night at a potential patron’s driver’s license before allowing entry…

Your Weekly Hardcoroscopes

Aries (March 21-April 19) Your temper will be your downfall this week, Aries. Pick your battles. Your Marxist memes on Facebook are concerning your family,…