SEATTLE — Depression and anxiety unexpectedly announced a co-headlining secret show last night at the prefrontal cortex venue inside the brain of Matt Daytona, leading…
NEW YORK — Struggling indie trio Sternum First adopted a French bulldog puppy yesterday, undergoing one final attempt to reconnect and save the band from…
DENVER — Local lo-fi chillhop fanatic Connor Davidson withstood the urge last night to unwind and study while at a Tomppabbeats concert, harshed-out sources confirm.…
HUDSON, N.Y. — Chester Fields, self-proclaimed “super fan” of indie-rock band The Break, paid a grand total of $0.00 yesterday for the band’s new album…
KIEV, Ukraine – A seemingly depressed Eugene Hütz, frontman of gypsy punk band Gogol Bordello, experienced little to no outward joy last night whilst swinging…
BALTIMORE — Following weeks of public pressure, local classic rock station WBZA admitted today that their claim of playing “all the hits” is false, as…
LOS ANGELES — Instagram celebrity Mayo the Corgi, also known by the handle @CheckOutMayOverbite, filed a lawsuit yesterday in Los Angeles County against owner Carly…
WINSTON-SALEM, N.C. — Feminine care brand Playtex and Ibanez Guitars held a joint press conference today to announce a collaboration for a new model of…
CHICAGO — Tattooed members of touring hardcore band Sin Eater are reportedly tired of fielding questions as to whether or not they are chefs every…
NEW YORK — The New York City Department of Parks and Recreation released today its highly anticipated annual summer guide, which now includes the best…
NEW YORK — Inventor and former Weezer fan Dr. Stanley Tankowitz successfully time travelled last week to September 10, 2001, to warn Americans that Weezer…
BOSTON — Local dad and tire store manager Dennis Bowman broke his nearly three-year social media silence today by posting, “Outback Steakhouse near me” as…
BAR HARBOR, Maine — Local teenager Russ Mitchell, Jr. was uncomfortable and unsure where to direct his gaze yesterday after hearing his father say, “I…
DENVER — Local punk Zane Winslow Jr. claimed today that although he is named after his father and is familiar with his father’s existence, he…
WARRINGTON, Pa. — Local man Bryan Walsh is terrified and “jumping to insane conclusions” this morning after his father, commercial electrician Murray Walsh, cryptically said…
