LAS VEGAS — Local trick-or-treaters at Fat Mike’s house were sadly let down after receiving copies of NOFX’s release “The Decline” in lieu of candy,…
POWAY, Calif. – Local mother Faye Leidersman was horrified after finding a copy of Blink-182’s new album ‘One More Time’ in her child’s bag of…
Subcultures tend to take themselves way too goddamn seriously. That’s why Type O Negative’s sarcastic take on gothic metal was and is so vital. The…
GLENDALE, Calif. — A local man who was at first believed to be dressed in an impeccable GG Allin costume was later revealed to simply…
NEW YORK – A recent Bloomberg report announced that Taylor Swift’s wealth is now an estimated $1.1 Billion, after her record-breaking Eras tour and left…
HOUSTON — Self-starter Norwegian black metal band Necrocide flew to America with the goal of setting fire to a Megachurch, sources confirmed. “We’ve been burning…
New York — Local thirty-something punk Charles Murray is unable to settle on an official complaint about this year’s Fest, indecisive sources confirmed. “I go…
CHICAGO — Several TSA agents at O’Hare International Airport detained metal fan Aex Parker for attempting to board a flight to Germany while carrying an…
Morning, dear reader. To start, we have to say the fact or opinion that The Spill Canvas is not a band, but, if we’re being…
LONDON – Just hours after announcing a “new” Beatles song enabled by artificial intelligence, the surviving members of the seminal rock group, Paul McCartney and…
NEW YORK — The nation was in uproar last week when it was discovered that Rolling Stone’s list of 250 greatest guitarists failed to acknowledge…
BALTIMORE — The lead guitarist of a local thrash punk band Sierra Piss incited a scandal at a baseball game after being caught on the…
MOLINE, Ill. — Local Dream Theater fan Beth Hillebrand enjoyed unfettered access to the venue’s female washroom thanks to being the only woman in attendance,…
FORT WAYNE, Ind. — A recently discovered painting of Leonardo da Vinci’s the lost lower half of “Mona Lisa” depicted the subject wearing JNCO jeans,…
LAS VEGAS — Increasing demand for Ibuprofen following When We Were Young 2, a festival targeting millennials who desperately want to relive their best years,…