CHICAGO — Local man Tom Bencin, who recently spent $35 on a Pussyslaughter T-shirt that reads “#1 PUSSY MURDERER” in giant letters, has not yet…
INDIO, Calif. –– Swarms of honeybees began their annual trek to the Coachella music festival early Friday morning to pollinate thousands of flower crowns worn…
DALLAS — Ricardo “the Scuzz” Garza tripled his net worth last night when he found a half of a pack of cigarettes on a venue…
AMSTERDAM — The life-long dream of American metal band Goat Machine came true last week when they finally performed a show in Holland for a…
There’s no getting around it: America is a pretty fucked up place if you’re not rich and white, and under Trump’s administration things are only…
INDIO, Calif. — President Trump’s original January 2017 administration lineup will reunite for this year’s Coachella music & arts festival, according to a press release…
DALLAS, Texas — Concerned mother and sole reason for her children’s anxieties Pamela Yates suggested this morning that her kids “try listening to happier music,…
Hard Times investigates an age-old question: What was the world’s first meme? And what did Billy Idol have to do with it? To see…
BROOKLYN, N.Y. — Drummer Matt “Deadbolt” Horowitz of local folk-punk band Whiskey Dumpster Pioneerz couldn’t play his set last night when none of the other…
DAYTON, Ohio — Local apartment tenant Adrian Delgado has filed his fifth noise complaint this month with building management, claiming that his next door neighbor…
Brothers, As The Sect’s first ever reporter, and its only member with permission to leave our community, I serve as the conduit through which all…
ALLENTOWN, Penn. — Metal diehard James Allen used the online tax filing platform TaxSlayer yesterday to “eviscerate, desecrate, and properly file” his 1040EZ tax return,…
Well, this isn’t good. Coheed Analytica, a data firm out of the United Kingdom that specializes in using people’s emo phases to undercut the authenticity…
LOS ANGELES — Indie rock mainstays The Decemberists’ new album, I’ll Be Your Girl, will be shipped with a syllabus, complete with required reading and…
I like to think I’ve got the hang of this whole “Being in my 30s” thing. I take care of myself, I have a respectable…