INDIANAPOLIS — A local jazz drummer’s rant last night about stereotypical death metal band names, using only morbid phrases and references to physical violence, reportedly…
JERSEY CITY, N.J. — Local infamous “Kilt Guy” Jeremy Flanagan played a dangerous, nard-threatening game last night by crowd surfing at a Dropkick Murphys’ show…
HARRISONBURG, Va. — Local punk and obvious alcoholic Marcia Fries announced moments ago that despite consuming nearly a dozen cans of Pabst Blue Ribbon beer…
MISSOULA, Mont. — Democratic Presidential candidate Bernie Sanders gave several members of the Missoula DIY scene last night freehand tattoos in the kitchen of a…
NORFOLK, Va. — The .org URL used by Norfolk DIY venue The Kirk Skramz-eron Center for Music and Culture blatantly misrepresents the level of organization…
Erica, oh my God, no! Erica? ERICA??! Nonononono please come back to me. This can’t be real. My beautiful Erica, snatched from me in the…
LOS ANGELES — Matt Skiba, guitarist and vocalist for celebrated pop-punk bands Alkaline Trio and Blink-182, emailed his resume this morning to Northern California punk…
CUMBERLAND, Md — Local mom Beth Clarke proudly placed a print-out of her son’s band’s 7.1 Pitchfork review on her fridge today, citing the notable…
OLYMPIA, Wash. — Local punk frontman Dylan Fremont revealed today that he was waiting to “meet the right guys” before offering his most special gift:…
LOS ANGELES — Indie-rock band OK Go visited the Cypress Park Home Depot early Wednesday morning to purchase hundreds of electric leaf blowers, thrilled managerial…
Poetic Justice: This Guitar Center Employee Just Sat in My House and Played With a Blender Then Left
Poetic Justice: This Guitar Center Employee Just Sat in My House and Played With a Blender Then Left
I wish I could take it back. I wish I had never set foot into that Guitar Center just before close and played guitar until…
PITTSBURGH — A local film club consisting entirely of goths announced today that their next event will feature a screening of the 1994 film “The…
GAINESVILLE, Fla. — Local punk Hazel Mason ate her entire three-day supply of weed earlier today while standing in line to enter The Fest, trying…
CONCORD, Calif. — A local punk teenager resisted becoming “a vessel for consumerist propaganda” today by immediately covering the logo on her brand-new Jansport backpack…
RALEIGH, N.C. — Talented up-and-coming mosher Kurt Scalloway is unable to participate in hardcore activities for roughly one month, after doctors and cobblers confirmed he…