LONDON — Legendary Rolling Stones guitarist Keith Richards is completely oblivious that he will soon embark on his final string of performances, confirmed the Lord…
BETHPAGE, N.Y. — Hardcore quartet Breakpunch accidentally created a rift in the Long Island hardcore scene last night by inadvertently covering the entire set of…
LODI, N.J. — A group of neighborhood kids scattered and hid for the rest of the afternoon yesterday after their baseball accidentally smashed “crazy old…
LOS ANGELES — 36-year-old skateboarder Rodney Sanders found himself in a great moral predicament yesterday when he sided with irate property owners after watching various…
DAYTONA BEACH, Fla. — Local man Jamaal Andie, a.k.a. DJ SKRAMZ, asked several DJs and showgoers last night at the Apex to loan him their…
TOLEDO, Ohio — Touring punk band Pull Start are eagerly anticipating the next completely disastrous occurrence to befall them during the remainder of their five-week…
LUBBOCK, Texas — Aging punk and amateur life coach Robbie Ginsburg was charged today with criminal negligence after authorities discovered four of his mentees died…
LANGHAM, Saskatchewan — A Beta Cucks show last night at the Langham Legion Hall was interrupted when a windmilling punk was tilted by a mysterious…
GRAND RAPIDS, Mich. — A new biography titled Coming All Over the Country, chronicling the life of frontman Ollie Campbell of Ollie Campbell and the…
CHARLESTOWN, S.C. — Presidential hopeful Bernie Sanders had his Ford Econoline tour van stolen from outside the Democratic debate earlier night, sources close to the…
CUPERTINO, Calif. — Longtime Apple technical writer Jerry Perrywinkle released a passionate yet long-winded statement today about his 18 years as the author of Apple’s…
PHOENIX — Folk punk band Poor Man’s Richard surprised concertgoer and superfan Dave Cumberbatch last night by inviting him on stage to “play a milk…
BIRMINGHAM, Ala. — Local man Dan Traver warned friends this morning that his roommate Will Fu’s tweeting of various Elliott Smith lyrics will likely “…turn…