Remember when you first discovered punk? We sure do. You were between the ages of thirteen and sixteen and full of fire and ambition. You…
Does the My Chemical Romance singer think I’m stupid? He clearly must think I’m a big fucking joke if he assumes I’m dumb enough to…
LEXINGTON, Ky. — Local musician Teddie Hutchinson broke his 23-day streak of avoiding anything resembling a natural food when he accidentally ingested a mouthful of…
SEATTLE — Self-proclaimed Twitter activist Rachel Morrow claimed that if they had access to a functioning time machine they would use it to travel back…
CHICAGO — Standing against the wall, milling about, or looking around while waiting for acts to play is considered the favorite part of shows at…
DES MOINES, Iowa — Local man Dale Harrison was admitted to the ICU at St. Mary’s Hospital last Thursday after discovering that the drummer of…
ROCKLAND, Maine — A disheveled old sea captain enthralled patrons of the Drunken Algae Tavern last night, telling a harrowing tale of the time he…
CLEVELAND — Local frontman and full-time IT specialist Kirk Lawson alerted members of his band Nuggitzz that they would once again need to change their…
HOBOKEN, N.J. — The members of local emo band Featherhoof were reportedly overwhelmed with gratitude when longtime fan and friend David Ketwaller remarked that they…
Live shows are back, and the next year is going to be a groundbreaking time for music, for real this time! You’re vaxxed, waxed, and…
LOS ANGELES — Film director and Limp Bizkit frontman Fred Durst put an end to years of debate by issuing a statement clarifying that the…
Recently, we took a trek to New Jersey to take in the food, culture, and historic sights of… alright, fine, we admit it! Our girlfriend…
LINKÖPING, Sweden — Confused audience members were shocked at a recent Forest Floor show when the band, dressed in matching cloaks and heavy eyeshadow, began…
ORLEANS, Mass. — Local tattoo enthusiast Danny Lipinski’s latest tattoo depicting the cast of “Friends” engaged in a pansexual orgy is being described as “an…
MESA, Ariz. — Over-indulgent guitarist Marky Pritchard was careful to make sure none of his roommates were home before he churned out some truly masturbatory…