KEENE, Ky. — Several Keene residents have reported cases of voter intimidation at the small town’s early voting location, noting that the polls are being…
WASHINGTON — Despite many pictures and sources alleging its development, the Trump administration has remained tight lipped about the heavily rumored Melania Series X. “There…
WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump took to Twitter last night to announce that all American forces currently serving overseas in Donkey Kong Country are expected…
WASHINGTON — Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi and Senator Chuck Schumer have introduced a bill that, if passed, would condemn COVID-19 as a “very…
WARMINSTER, Pa. — Local transphobe Graham Webb, 34, has reportedly died after an AGM-114 Hellfire Missile fired from an MQ-9 Reaper Drone owned by the…
WASHINGTON D.C. — President Donald Trump is facing criticism from Democratic leaders after announcing plans to divert funding from the Nintendo Wii’s Everybody Votes channel…
TALLAHASSEE, Fla. — Famously unremarkable politician and former presidential nominee Jeb Bush began his new Twitch stream tonight in an unprecedented failure, debuting the same…
WASHINGTON — TikTok sensation Claudia Conway released a series of bombshell videos today revealing that her mother and close Trump advisor Kellyanne Conway lied about…
WASHINGTON — Continuing his trend of bucking universally accepted social norms, President Donald Trump today announced his refusal to pass the controller to anybody else,…
EL PASO, Texas — Former United States representative Beto O’Rourke announced a new skateboarding video game that lets players collect the letters to spell out…
SCHOOL II — U.S. Secretary of Education Betsy DeVos demanded funding cuts after witnessing a professional skateboarder do a 360 kickflip into a high school…
WASHINGTON — Documents leaked by an anonymous whistleblower show that President Donald Trump attempted to hire Bugs Bunny for the purpose of sawing Mexico off…

Opinion: Pikmin 3 Deluxe Re-Release Comes Just in Time to Teach Children the Value of Mass Sacrifice
Our nation’s schools are facing a crisis — not a crisis of health, but a crisis of fear. Parents, misinformed by the liberal media, seem…
SANTA MONICA — Activision revealed a new ‘Star Wars’ video game today entitled Call of Duty: Black Ops Cold War, available late 2020. “We know…