RALEIGH, N.C. — Friends of record enthusiast Tom Montgomery expressed grave concern that they may be asked to help move his massive collection one day,…
BLOOMINGTON, Ind. — Pretentious bourbon sniffer Patrick Welles is ruining the otherwise fun vibes of an impromptu house party hang with his talk of tasting…
MINNEAPOLIS — Local punk house Last Resort Lodge commemorated the official arrival of spring by bidding farewell to the resident rats that took up winter…
LOS ANGELES — Local man and self-described “music aficionado” Alex King once again paid $15 for access to a music streaming subscription despite only listening…
TRUMANSBURG, N.Y. — Local vegan James Alta announced plans to increase his number of matches on various dating platforms by posing with a bag of…
NEW YORK — Local Band Twice Forgotten is ecstatic in their naivety after negotiating their first record contract despite the fact the executive clearly said…
NEW YORK — Friends of departed punk Malcom Kelly paid tribute to him on the one-year anniversary of this death by doing everything that led…
SYRACUSE, N.Y. – Local goth Sarah Lashley is rejecting modern bedding options and instead chooses to sleep in a casket resting on the floor, confirmed…
BERKELEY, Calif. — A popular local hacky-sack circle broke late yesterday afternoon up over key creative disagreements among its many members, sources report. “I’ve loved…
ANN ARBOR, Mich. — Local man Rick Anderson remains ignorant to the fact that the generous beer donations he makes to his neighbors’ basement shows…
PROVIDENCE, R.I. — Accountant Keith Lowell has the suffix “guitar” at the end of his Instagram handle despite showing no signs nor evidence of having…