MANCHESTER, N.H. — Dan Levitton, lead vocalist for touring hardcore band Weekend Proposal, told the “motherfuckers” in the back to “just, like, shut up for…
ELDERSBURG, Md. — The appeal of joining a “throuple” for local woman Denise Hubbard was completely obliterated by prospective partners Micah Herrera and Lorenzo Cummings’…
CINCINNATI — 26-year-old punk Bobby Larson is now listing a local 7-Eleven cashier as his only emergency contact in lieu of close friends or relatives,…
WASHINGTON — Local mom Melissa Weir traveled to the Capitol this week to confront Frances Haugen, the Facebook whistleblower, demanding to know why the eating…
BOSTON — 34-year-old Ryan Conway was seemingly unaware that the similarly aged couple he was talking with throughout the night were just there to chaperone…
LAREDO, Texas – Shockwaves of mistrust ripped through punk band The Distracted after a member’s significant other admitted to hooking up with the band’s Roland…
ROSWELL, Ga. — Local high school theater teacher and known eccentric, Jean St. John, is highly doubtful about pulling off the musical ‘Brigadoon’ for this…
HIGHLAND PARK, Ill. — Smashing Pumpkins frontman Billy Corgan surprised onlookers when he dramatically removed a bald cap to reveal a full head of luxurious…
NEW YORK — Tony’s Tracksuits CEO Anthony Dante announced this morning that the tracksuit industry’s image “will never recover” from the success of Netflix’s latest…
NORTH HALEDON, N.J. — A recently cleaned bedroom was left completely ravaged and covered in underwear, socks, receipts, and pillows in local woman Katherine Hart’s…
CAMDEN, N.J. — Turntable manufacturing giants, Victrola, released a new line of 8-in-1 Bluetooth record players that promise to give any Spotify playlist a warmer,…
CHICAGO — Local man Nicholas Braun completely rearranged his vinyl record collection in order to achieve optimal impressiveness for his upcoming date with Alison Prenwich,…