SALT LAKE CITY — Local Metal Singer Caleb Blackburn recently found that the secret to honing his screaming skills is to attempt to have any…
Primus and Puscifer to Co-Headline Unbearable Tinder Date Convention
COLUMBUS, Ohio —Notoriously weird bands Primus and Puscifer announced a joint headlining show at an upcoming Unbearable Tinder Date Convention which expects to draw thousands…
Type O Negative Albums Ranked Worst to Best
Subcultures tend to take themselves way too goddamn seriously. That’s why Type O Negative’s sarcastic take on gothic metal was and is so vital. The…
Woman at Dream Theater Show Just Happy to Not Have to Wait in Line for the Bathroom for Once
MOLINE, Ill. — Local Dream Theater fan Beth Hillebrand enjoyed unfettered access to the venue’s female washroom thanks to being the only woman in attendance,…
Doom Metal Band Announces First Song Will Also Be Last Song
ALLENTOWN, Pa. — Local doom metal band Don’t Wake The Dwarf decided to make an announcement at their show this weekend that their opening song…
CHICAGO — Area metal band Blood Fuel was left reconsidering their group’s future after hearing a man adjust his chair in a coffee shop at…
Every Hatebreed Album Ranked Worst to Best
Hatebreed formed in 1994 and initially spread their brand of baggy-pantsed metalcore from Connecticut all the way to the western end of Connecticut. Shortly after…
The best thing about music, whether it be punk or metal or any genre of music that has been around long enough to establish strong…
GLENDALE, Ariz. — Tech death metal and former deathcore darlings Job for a Cowboy explained the sexual implications of their name once and for all,…
Every Ice Nine Kills Album Ranked Worst To Best
Let’s start this Ice Nine Kills studio album ranking list with an inquiry: How the hell did a former ska band, who eventually moonlit as…
Every Guns N’ Roses Album Ranked Worst To Best
You know you’re in a huge band when an iPhone autocorrects the spelling of your band name if it is unintentionally misspelled with an apostrophe…
TORONTO — Legendary Canadian heavy metal band Stone Hammer were completely transparent when addressing fans about their new record, saying that the material is definitely…
Every Havok Record Ranked Worst to Best
Ever wished that Slayer’s pathological need to play at cokehead speed was combined with the earworm serpentine riffing of Metallica? Then you’d like Havok. The…
Metal-Themed Spelling Bee Ends in First Round When Nobody Comes Close to Getting Sanguisugabogg Correct
LAS CRUCES, N.M. — Organizers of a spelling bee primarily focused on metal band names were disappointed to see every participant eliminated in the first…
Every Pig Destroyer Album Ranked Worst to Best
It’s a waste of time trying to explain the appeal of grindcore to you—or anyone, for that matter. You get it or you don’t. You’re…